Friday, May 28, 2004

hard stuff to find
going through the drawers and pulling out pictures of my father. or finding the mix tape an ex made with photo booth pictures inside. or old diaries which log in sadder times and notebooks full of teenage angst. and sketchbooks which seem foreign to me now. some things are nice to throw away. some things are unbearable to throw away. even though you probably won't ever look at them again.

helena just called and she was a little tipsy. i was sad when she called and now i am sadder. tonight, she is celebrating jessica's birthday. she called me to check her email and then the phone was passed to jessica and i wished her a happy birthday, but then babbled about my sad life right now. and, then katherine came in and surprised jessica and i was still on the line and i could hear them, but wasn't sure if the phone would be passed back to helena or anyone else. but then, i heard a click and there was nothing. and now, i am back to nothing. i am in this house with little things to do here and there, but i feel trapped and i feel like i shouldn't have been made to come here because i am not doing that much anyway. which, may be my own fault, but i don't know what to do really. i guess i just don't want to clear out this house. i want to start my life in my new house and be with my friends. at this moment, i feel very much like the princess locked up in the tower. i'd let down my hair, but i haven't washed it in a few days and it's kind of nasty.

maybe i am being selfish. but my job (of clearing out my room) is nearly done. as to the rest of the house, i have not a clue. i imagine that i will be summoned to help out with that as the end of the month nears.

...i want my indian flute...


holy crap, people-
getting rid of everything you ever owned in life, is pretty difficult. throughout the day, i have been going into my room and sifting through my things and deciding what was crap and what was for keeps and, maybe you have done this at some point in your life, dear reader, but this is a first for me, for i have never moved and i have lived in this house my entire 25 years of life.

this year, a friend of mine at school was getting all freaky-leeky and dating this 17 year old, who may be a cutey, but, is barely legal. it turns out that he was born on may 17th, 1987, 8 years after my own birthday. and, when i met him, i told him that we had a few things in common, one being that he knows mary smith and i do as well, and the second thing being that we shared the same birthday. i also proceeded to tell this young, handsome lad that the year that he was born, was the best summer of my life for it was the year that i went to disney world and was able to really really appreciate it for the first time. the very first time i was in disney world, was actually when i was in my mom's belly.... but, really, that shouldn't count. anyway, moving on. so, yes, the best summer of my life was the summer when i was 8 and my family took a road trip to disney world and we had a wonderful time. and, as i was going through my room, i found the photo album that captured that special time in my life. i had my picture taken with all the disney characters. we had a special mickey breakfast at the polynesian hotel, as well as a luau at night. and, i had a couple of teeth missing at the time, so it was nice to see that as well and be thankful that you only go through that once in life (hopefully). anyway, i grappled with the decision of keeping the album or tossing it and i chose keeping it because it brought back good memories of simpler times. if i had a scanner, i would scan in some of the pictures. you'd have to take notice of the duds, they were so silly back then.

now, i shall go back to said room and try and work a bit more. this endeavor shouldn't be taking me so long. i wish i had a taskmaster here to keep me in line. and, the hip hop mix of summer 04 is coming along pretty well, i think. it occurred to me that these summer mixes are the most top 40 things i have ever done, and i am not ashamed of it and i embrace it because it's all in fun. if you have a suggestion, please post it on the tagboard. thanks -

thus far, in order:
the roots - break you off
outkast - the way you move
twista feat. kanye west - overnight celebrity
kanye west - all falls down
missy elliott - pass that dutch
timbaland & magoo - indian flute
kelis - milkshake
jay-z - dirt off your shoulders
j-kwon - tipsy
n.e.r.d. - she wants to move
beyonce - naughty girl
usher feat. ludacris & lil jon - yeah
loon feat. kelis - how you want that
lloyd banks - on fire
youngbloodz feat. lil jon - damn

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

it's pretty amazing how awful your posts can be when you are completely and utterly exhausted. late night posts, such as last night's (now deleted), are terrible and i have this habit of posting when i really should be fast asleep. even after posting that blog entry, i managed to inundate virginia's cell phone with silly text messages. i must have sent her at least four.

good news:
i have a job! starting june 4th, i will work in hunt valley at a framing shop. i am going to be trained how to frame and mat things! awesome!
i brought my sculpture piece over to the welsh road library in philly and everything went off without a hitch. i feel terribly indebted to all those who helped me with the creation of this piece (i.e. nishi, virginia, cristy) and those who helped me move it and transport it (i.e. helena, virginia, justin, pam). thank you! tomorrow i go back to the library to help out with the installation. and then, i am done with it! this feels great, i must say. just great!

now, i am starving and out of it. just spoke to tami and she was pretty out of it, too. the two of us needed to get off the phone because we couldn't carry on a conversation due to these circumstances. but, perhaps we will hang out tonight.

take care, internet. until next time - - -

Friday, May 21, 2004

birthday, turned 25---
graduated college---
moving into new place in baltimore---
moving out of my house in philly and saying goodbye to philly for a year---

these are the things that are new in my life. i haven't been able to post as of late due to the hectic schedule and also the busted computer that had been sitting in my room. it was a nice laptop while it lasted.

birthday was pretty much amazing. everything went off without a hitch. i had wonderful people there, and got some of the most thoughtful presents, in the order of receipt:
1) a birthday serenade from marlowe and josh
2) a gigantic card from russell and "my art"
3) a crossword puzzle personalized with clues relating to my life from bonnie and marlowe
4) a ticket to the pixies concert in philly from helena and adam
5) a pedicure w/jessica mcdevitt, from jessica mcdevitt
6) a light-up baton with streamers from jessica stephenson
7) two mad-libs from tim paggi
8) a beautiful book and candle-holder w/candle from bonnie (an end of the night surprise)
9) a gift certificate for record and tape traders from nishi
10) soup mugs from courtney

birthdays are definitely not about the presents and i have become quite content with not receiving presents anymore as i get older. but, i am just so overwhelmingly thankful for all of these things and for people being so sweet and caring. thank you friends.

and, today, i graduated from college. the end of an era and now i am moving on. i'm a bit sad about this, but like i have been telling myself, it's not the end, it's only the beginning. am i the corniest girl, or what? oh, and masking-taped my cap so that it said "i (heart)u mom." it may not be particularly original, but it just felt soo right because without ma mere, i don't know where i would be. thanks mom!

now, i am going to get in my car and head off to the house and unload said car. i am tired and sweaty and hungry. but, it must be done!

goodbye internet, for now. i don't know when i will be able to blog again....

take care - oxox -

Thursday, May 13, 2004

hello internet
i am home right now, back in the old computer room. today, i learned that we got a place to live in hampden. cool. i am glad we have a place to live. but, as i am home, i am looking at every piece of furniture and thinking, "do i want that? should i take it for this new home i will be living in? will my roommates want it?" because all of the furniture in my house back in philly is up for grabs since my mom will be moving and she doesn't want most of it. i really want virg, rus, and hel to come check this stuff out because i need some new eyes to see whether it would be good or not. ideally, i would have a couple thousand dollars to spend on furniture and accessories, but that will never happen, of course. that'll be for the future, when i actually get to live in my lil dreamworld.

anyway, tonight was my mother's retirement dinner. it was just like a movie in a way, but way more embarassing. i was an hour late. i was outrageously shy because i was wearing dressy/pretty clothes and people kept coming up to me and telling me i looked nice. i knew a lot of people there because i grew up in the library and there is this weird thing about being a "library brat" and such. i think it's because a lot of librarians are single or are married but have no children and so, instead, they treat their coworker's children as their own. many people, tho, i haven't seen in many many many years and i heard a lot of, "oh my goodness! you are so grown up! i remember when you were a little baby/girl." it was very much like a family reunion with family members that you never ever see.

anyway, my mom's old boss made a speech that was borderline ridiculous, ingenious, and funny. she had one of those baby key toys that you give to....ummm, babies, that's hard plastic that babies suck on and nibble on and then drop on the floor. you know what i mean, big colored plastic keys on a big colored plastic keyring. and each key represented something. for instance, the green key represented all the money my mom helped fundraise for the library. stuff like that. her speech was actually pretty good, as i learned stuff about my mom that i didn't know, such as one of the first libraries she worked at was in an old stable/firehouse. the place still had the openings for the horses' heads and there was even a pole in the middle of the library. i wonder if it's still around - i'd like to check it out. after the boss's speech, mom spoke and she was a lil sad and teary-eyed but said the nicest, most heartfelt things. and then, before i knew it, my brother was stomping his way to the dj booth and messing around and this guy that my mom worked with got on the microphone and before you knew it this huge congo line broke out, with my mom as the leader and myself behind her and everyone was forced to get up and shout, "feeling HOT HOT HOT!!" it was so silly watching librarians in a congo line. i think that was when i felt most uncomfortable. or, perhaps it was when one of the librarian guys was asked to sing and he sang stevie wonder, but dedicated it to his mother who passed away a week ago and today was her birthday. he wanted us to clap and sing along, but i think it made everyone too sad and uncomfortable. plus, i kept hearing my bro making references to this guy's inebriation.

and, then of course, everyone knew that i graduated and they all had to ask that dreaded question, "so! what are you going to do now that you've graduated?" and thank god i was able to say, "well...i don't know, but at least i have a place to live!"

so, that was my night
and soon i will be sleeping
next to my miko

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

when will this day end? been so busy and i am so tired that i want to go to sleep now, but it's only 9:30pm. crap!

don't forget, reception tomorrow!!

Sunday, May 09, 2004

strange thing
i am unable to blog from my computer, for some reason. everytime i try, my computer crashes. so, that is partly the reason why i haven't been updating. the other part is busi-ness. i've been putting in long hours in the art building to get the show ready. today we'll finish it up and tomorrow it will open. here's the info:

may 9 - may 22
reception: may 12th, 6:30pm-9:30pm

corrin gallery
meyerhoff arts building
goucher college

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

oh boy
things are nearly finished with the student show at school. i have been working so much on that, that i haven't been able to do anything else, not even my own stuff. tonight i will work in the darkroom and finish up some prints, mount them on thursday or friday, and install on saturday. all of this business, of the past few days, has shown me what a thrill i get from all of this, even at it's most hectic moments. i could definitely see myself working in a gallery or installing somewhere. and, it would be much better than it has been, because i won't have to stop in the middle of what i am doing to do the stuff that i am supposed to be doing (i.e. class work, going to class, etc.).

tomorrow the postcards come in! i am so excited. i can't wait to go to sleep tomorrow and then check my mail box. i'm afraid that i'll have to wait until friday. that would suck.

also, that awesome apartment that we wanted so badly? didn't get it. (sigh) i nearly cried when virginia told me.... so, i guess the search continues.

Sunday, May 02, 2004

so, thursday was lots of working on stuff...i don't remember. it's all a blur.

and, friday was GIG (get into goucher), the big day of fun-filled activities augmented by lots of drinking. i didn't really get to enjoy it all, i probably spent a total of 1 hour enjoying the festivities...but, not really. i just ate some food and chatted with some people. instead, i worked GIG for a little bit and worked at the art gallery for a couple of hours. then met up with virginia and we both took showers and got ready for her big night --- dj'ing at the black cat/opening for dj rehka. that was a blast and she was awesome.

saturday, virginia, russell, helena and i checked out this place a couple block' from charles village. we fell in love with it and tried to win over the tenant who lives there now, even though he has no control over who gets the place. i hope i hope i hope we get it. and, the sexies played at night - i love them so much.

today is sunday. been working all day. at the library now and it looks like it's going to rain. going to head out of here soon and go to a house council meeting. blecch. more work to do for tonight. but, i also need to head over to the sculpture studio and start working on my final piece. sometimes, i just don't know where the time goes...